- In an alarming set of Tweets Donald Trump alleges that Potus 45 is reading his thoughts.
- Wikileaks releases evidence that the FBI is run by disgruntled Firefly fans who blame the series cancellation on the Clintons.
- The GOP attempts to build a pipeline to carry snake oil as an alternative to Obamacare.
- Sean Spicer simply stares at his shoes at a Whitehouse press conference and then leaves via a window.
- Vladimir Putin denies having any meeting with “the Russians”.
- Competing Breitbart articles attempt to coax the President through a giant maze.
- Pundits decry the extremism of the alt-alt, a group the describe as being like other things they prefix with “alt” but more so.
- Banana republics object to being compared to the USA.
- Mexico builds a wall on its northern border in case “the weirdness is contagious”.