After the advent of the krypto-fascist synonym ‘alt-right’, some conservatives have taken to using the term ‘cntrl-left’. By this, they just mean ‘left’. However, I feel other keyboard options could be handy.
- Tab-left: like normal left but every so often suddenly lurches to the right.
- Apple-key left: hates multinational corporations except when they make shiny shiny tech products (mea culpa)
- Option-left: left but with extra choices of hats.
- Window-key left: same as the apple key left but somehow more sad.
- Backspace-left: lurches leftward and magically disappears.
- Caps-lock left: really shouty – handy on demonstrations.
- Shift-left: quiet but ready to get shouty at a moments notice
- Esc left: present in every gathering of the left but nobody knows what they do or why they are there.
- Fn-left: look like ‘fun’ but actually just functional.